Trident Layers Gum

I’ve done a lot of food reviews on here, but since I’m a sucker for most new products and try them all out, I thought why not expand my reviews to other things, like gum?

The Trident Layers commercials (as cheesy as they are) sucked me in…people being paid in gum!  It’s that good?  And it looked so pretty, with three little layers of what looked like tasty flavors.

There are two varieties of Layers gum: Wild Strawberry+Tangy Citrus and Green Apple+Golden Pineapple.  I bought both and gave them a try.  Not exactly what I was expecting.

The green apple flavor is what I imagine the poison apple on Snow White would taste like.  The pineapple seems to get lost in the gross poison apple taste so it’s irrelevant.  The Wild Strawberry tasted a little bit better, but it still had too strong of a flavor.  Even after I spit it out I could taste it for hours.  Now if I’m chewing mint gum to freshen my breath, that’s fine.  But when you smell like a half rotten fruit smoothie all day, not quite as appealing.

Basically, if someone offers to pay you in Trident Layers, don’t fall for it.

(Click Read More if you haven’t seen the commercial.)
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Not-So-Smart Mop

The Smart Mop doesn’t look like such a bad product.  But when I saw this commercial I thought it was a joke.  You’ll see what I mean if you watch from about the 20 second mark to the 50 second mark.

Yes, that’s right.  In these tough times, we drink spilled Coke off the floor.  That mop may have been used to clean up sand, ketchup, and mustard, but when times get bad, it’s also useful for recycling spilled drinks.

It’s really convenient because usually when I spill my drink I have to get down on the floor and lap it up, but now with the Smart Mop, I can just put it back in the glass!  I’m ordering them now.

Potty Humor

In case you’ve ever needed to extend your reach a full 18 inches…

GM’s Reinvention: “This is not about going out of business, this is about getting down to business.”

General Motors has launched a new reinvention campaign, which I actually think is a brilliant idea.  They’re taking their losses and trying to make the best of it.  By admitting that they messed up, and that they were struggling, they appear more honest and reliable than before.  Instead of saying everything is fine, they are turning it around and showing how they learned from what happened, and how they can repair the damage.

The commercials also show lots of patriotic scenes: American flags, football, big cities.  It’s a not-so-subtle message that they are American made and support our country, something they have always used to try to stand out from the foreign auto companies.

I’m really impressed by the new campaign, and honestly hope that GM has truly learned from these hardships and will come back strong.  Although I lost respect for them in some ways, I have also gained respect for them for the way they’ve handled such a terrible situation.  I don’t respect the fact that so many people are losing jobs, or that they got themselves into a place where they had to ask for so much money, but if they come out as a better, more moral company, then something positive will come of all this.

http://www.gmreinvention.com/

Lindsay Lohan’s Fornarina Commercial

Flash.  Crash.  Smash.  Are those the sounds of Lindsay Lohan’s career or the new Fornarina campaign?  From the looks of this commercial, it’s both.  Constantly surrounded by controversy and scandal these days, it seems no one is willing to work with Lohan, and she has gone to Italy for help.  This commercial is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while.  Someone else may have been able to pull off this idea, but Lohan’s voice and attitude is completely fake and stale.  She’s not fooling anyone.  Watching her face in this commercial I feel like I can read her thoughts: “I’m only doing this for the money.  This is ridiculous.  Pink.  Bang.  Glam.”

Honda Civic’s Musical Road

I’ve been seeing this Civic commercial on TV for a while now, and I never could figure out what was going on.  I was thinking, “Where is this music coming from and why are they so excited about it?”  Finally I looked it up online and watched it closely a few times to figure it out.  They designed those little road grooves (that normally are used to tell you to slow down) to play out the tune of the William Tell Overture (better known to some as the Lone Ranger theme).

Once I actually figured out what the commercial was showing, I thought it was such a cool idea and researched it a little more to find out if it was a real road.  Turns out it is.  The road is Avenue K in Lancaster, California, and it is one of only four such “musical roads” in the world.  The grooves were “tuned” for the road’s 55mph speed limit and configured to work with the exact size and tires of a Honda Civic.  It would work with any car, although it may be slightly out of tune with larger vehicles.  The grooves were completed on September 5th.

Unfortunately, people living close to the road haven’t found it quite as entertaining as those who drive on it and have been taking their complaints to city hall.  When they constructed it, they didn’t think the sound would travel far enough to bother residents, but so many complaints were filed that the road has since been paved over.  It was a historical feat, being the first musical road in the United States, but I’m sure it won’t be the last.  Someone let me know when I can get my street custom tuned to “Womanizer” by Britney Spears.

T-Mobile Family Plan Hates Families

The new T-Mobile Family Plan commercials clearly have a horrible view of family life.  These commercials must be made by some bitterly divorced man, or an angry single woman who thinks it’s normal for men to treat their wives with complete disregard.

The first gem T-Mobile offered us was the “Derek with mustaches clause” commercial, as it’s come to be known.  The dad comes in where his family is all gathered and announces that he has gotten them the T-Mobile Family Plan and “now we can talk to our friends and family all we want.”  Unfortunately, the people they want to talk to are: “Skinny Pete” and “That Lady at my soccer games you always stare at” and “Derek with the mustache and Mustang Derek.”
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Taco Bell Enchilada Platter

If you watched the Superbowl, then you probably saw this commercial for the new Spicy Chicken Enchilada Platter at Taco Bell.  I consider new Taco Bell items a major life changing event, so I was pretty excited about the enchiladas.  The commercial is pretty stupid, but I still liked it for some reason.  Maybe because my eyes were mesmerized by the plates of spicy enchiladas in his hands, or the fact that whenever I hear that bell sound at the end of the commercial I turn into one of Pavlov’s dogs, drooling and running out the door to get my Taco Bell.  It’s an automatic response.

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It’s Not Glade, It’s Glah-DAY!

Apparently Glade is a big promoter of liars. First there was the terrible commercial with the woman inviting all her girlfriends over. But first she needs to light a candle. But, oh no! All she has is a cheap old Glade candle! So she has to peel the wrapper off and throw it away. She can’t have her country clubbing friends knowing she uses Glade candles! So they walk in, she tells them she has a luxurious French candle burning for their sniffing pleasure, yet (and I’m sure they expect you to just crack up at this) the wrapper is stuck on her butt! So they laugh at their poor, cheap, loser friend and say “Haven’t you ever heard of Glah-DAY” in their snobby rich voices. Oh how hilarious.  Watch it by clicking on Read More below.

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